A TRADITION WAS BORN

I want to tell a story, not about a specific place necessarily, but my experience and lessons I learned from traveling with three very special people in my life.

It might take me a bit to get to the point, but I promise I will get there, so bear with me. 

13 years ago, my Grandpa died. He was a strong-willed man who oozed personality, and that personality allowed him to snag my grandma (who I call Gma, and will henceforth be known as in this story). They were married for 47 years and they loved each other fiercely.  They fought and had issues like every married couple, but the way my Gma talks about him, makes me think that true love really does exist.

Being married for so long, Gma had quite an adjustment to make when he died. She was only 70 and a very active 70 at that.  I always used to joke that she had more energy at 70 then I did at 20 (I still say that 10 years later). The first of my Gma’s birthdays without my grandpa was undoubtedly going to be difficult, so my aunt and my mom decided it would be a good idea to take her away on holiday and have a girl’s weekend. That first year, they decided to go to London. Both my aunt and Gma living in England made it an easy place for them to get to, and London being the great city that it is, made for the perfect backdrop for the first of the trio’s birthday celebrations away.  They had such a wonderful time together, that they decided that they would go away for Gma’s birthday every year.

Thus, a tradition was born.

                                 Gma on her wedding day, opening cards, and champagne laughs

   

Subsequent years have brought them all over Europe, from Bruges, to Ireland, to Mallorca, and many places in between. The weekends are filled with laughter, sherry, and enough memories to last a lifetime. Three years ago, my mom asked me if I would like to join the party. As you can imagine, I was so honored.  As the only female of my generation on my mother’s side, it meant the world to me that they would let me in on these very special celebrations. 

I do want to backtrack a little bit, to give a little perspective, and talk about why them adding me to the trio meant so much to me.  I grew up in a family of boys. While 2 brothers and a father doesn’t seem like an excessive amount of men in a family, they all have very strong personalities, and thus my mother and I were outnumbered. It’s not necessarily a bad thing, but it did sometimes feel like the female voice, especially mine, wasn’t always heard.  When I was younger, I was always trying to be “one of the boys”, but as I grew older, I wanted my feminine voice to grow stronger. 

My parents are both from England and moved to the States shortly after they got married. The rest of my extended family remained in England, so I grew up somewhat isolated from everyone. We were fortunate enough to be able to go to England to visit everyone once or twice a year, but it was always a whirlwind while we were over there trying to see everyone. That being said, I didn’t get a whole lot of time to really spend with the women of the family.

It wasn’t until I was older that I saw the different qualities and personalities in each of the women in my family that made them unique, independent, and strong.

                                                         The Lake District, England

OK, so back to it. My mom, aunt, and Gma are three very strong, accomplished, and inspirational women. My Gma, in particular, is someone that I have always used as a beacon of strength. She worked and took care of her family in a time where women did not do that. She was beautiful, sassy, and independent. All while being nurturing and loyal.  Basically, she was the bee’s knees.

That is why, when my mom invited me to celebrate with them, I truly felt honored.  I got to not only see incredible places, but I also got to spend time with and learn about these women in my family.  I got to see their true personalities. They didn’t have to be wives or mothers on those days, they could just be themselves, women. I got to see the special connection that they had, a bond that could never be broken. I saw them argue (they have very different beliefs on pretty much every issue) and where most people would fall out, they argued, and then turned around and hugged it out; stronger in their own convictions, but understanding and respecting the other person.

                                           Lakefish Ravioli in Butter Sauce, Stresa 

Now, I know that I am supposed to talk about my actual trips, but I find that the details are a bit frivolous compared to what I got out of the experiences. My favorite trip was my first with the crew which was to Nice, France. We stayed in an overly lavish hotel, walked the Chagall-decorated cobbled streets of Saint Paul de Vence, saw some of the great art masters’ works, and ate some of the best food I have ever had the pleasure of eating. It was also the first and only time I’ve had Chateau Margaux, which is on my wine bucket list. It was truly a magical and special experience, but my favorite part was the laughter and love that we shared.

So my advice to anyone who says they don’t have time, or work is too crazy, take that trip anyway. Whether it’s with family, friends, or solo.  The memories you create are priceless, and you never know what positive life-affirming things will come from them.  I’m so thankful for the time that I have gotten to spend with my amazing family, and I look forward to so many more adventures and laughs together.

MY NEW YEAR'S IN PORTUGAL - Alfama Love.

Lisbon, December 28th, 2015

Alfama Love.

Photo by The Travel Butterfly

Last night while I was in bed, I got homesick. It  was weird that it happened so early on the trip.  For some reason I was missing my mom’s house, being with her…

This morning, however, I feel renewed, rested and happy to begin another day….

I thought I could get to Castillo San Jorge today, but it’s drizzling and one of the attractions is to enjoy the view of the city from one of its towers.  So, I decide to go to Alfama. I’ve seen so many amazing photos, so this was on the top of my list.

Photo by The Travel Butterfly

I walk a few blocks, and here I am in Alfama…..and I’m in love. This place is magical; I stop following a map because I truly don’t mind getting lost while discovering its charming alleys. I must be smiling because many people are smiling at me, and it feels great…

Photo by The Travel Butterfly

I run into this lady with white hair, she smiles and advises I keep my bag close. I didn’t realize it was open.

Photo by The Travel Butterfly.

Photo by The Travel Butterfly.

After walking for a couple of hours, I end up at the Mirador. It was on my agenda but I ended up here by accident. My love for Lisbon is growing by the minute. This view of the city changing colors at night is priceless; I sit down just to enjoy the view.

Photo by The Travel Butterfly.

Photo by The Travel Butterfly.

My mind starts wandering: I should have booked a place here in Alfama. Then, I start thinking about the following weeks; where am I going to go next? Porto? Madeira?

Do I stay here?...ah!, the beauty of spontaneous traveling!

To be continued...

"DISCOVERING THE TRUE MEANING OF LIFE AND LOVE"

Thailand, 2006.

Written by Wanderercatt.

Khao Lak Police Boat Memorial.  Photo by The Wanderercatt.

The first time I visited Thailand, I was a student at university studying abroad. I decided that I wanted to take advantage of the many study abroad opportunities that my university offered, but where to go? In order to not go TOO out of my comfort zone, I decided to do a semester-long course in Australia (an English speaking country – yes that was a factor).  The beauty of this program was that there was a month-long study tour in Southeast Asia to open the semester.  We would spend a month visiting Malaysia, Thailand, Myanmar, and Cambodia before heading off to Australia for 6 months.

The more I try to put my life then into words, I realize that sometimes words are not sufficient to describe the feelings and experiences. I find it difficult to convey the emotions, sensations, and lessons that I learned during my time there.  It truly altered my perspective and taught me more about life than any class or vacation ever could. Despite my lack of eloquence, I want to share a few of my experiences because they truly were special. They live with me to this day and whether I am conscious of it, it shapes the way I think and act. Alternatively, I also don’t want to forget these times. As I grow older and do more, travel more, live more, I don’t want this important time in my life to fade into the background or become a dream.

Our group of 17 consisted of college students from all over the United States. We were all doe-eyed and excited to take in every experience and opportunity that was put in front of us. I had traveled a lot growing up, but it had never been without my family, so sometimes I look back and think that I never really visited all those places I had vacationed. I saw these cities and countries through fancy hotel rooms and restaurants, but I didn’t feel like I ever truly experienced the cultures.

Starting this journey and ready to board my flights, I remember being so nervous. I didn’t really know anyone in the group, and even though some of the students attended the same university as I did, I felt as if we were all but strangers. Little did I know that these people would become my family over the next 6 months and to this day, no one outside of that group will understand what we experienced because it was so unique..

A lot of the Southeast Asian study tour was meant to focus on scholarly education as opposed to life lessons.  In many of the other countries we visited museums, met with ambassadors, and listened to lectures.  And while that was all informative and interesting, as a psychology major, I wanted to focus more on people and how their culture and experiences impacted them.  I think that’s what drew me to Thailand. I felt that compared to any other country I visited I was able to connect more with the people of Thailand as well as my fellow peers.

Kao Yao Noi Bungalow. Photo by The Wanderercatt.

While in Thailand, we visited many different parts of the country, but the parts where I learned and connected the most were the places impacted by the tsunami.  

We learned about what happened on that fateful day, we visited memorials, and worked with a group that worked tirelessly to clean up the ocean. We would stay in open huts where we fell asleep looking at the millions of stars in the sky. We kayaked across the ocean, we drank by the fire, we told stories, we learned what it meant to connect not only as humans, but with nature.  We would meet people from all walks of life and learn about their stories. We would find that you can connect with anyone as long as you strip away judgement and see people for who they are. 

Kao Yao Noi View. Photo by The Wanderercatt. 

One of my favorite experiences, possibly in my lifetime, is doing a homestay on a tiny island close to Phuket. Our group was divided into smaller groups of 3-4 and invited to stay in the homes of the people living on the island. 

 My home was a simple one. It had a kitchen and a living area that opened onto a sleeping area. There was one bed where the whole family slept.  It was a simple hut built on stilts, as the rainy season can cause flooding so all the houses on this island were on stilts.  The bathroom was an outhouse, and if I can remember rightly, there was some running water, but it was scarce. 

The family consisted of a husband, wife, and son. The man was a fisherman and would go out at dawn every day and return at sundown with food for his family. They lived off the land. They grew and caught what they ate.  It was the true definition of rustic and it was magical.

Kao Yoa Noi Homestay. Photo by The Wanderercatt

Now, don’t get me wrong, I am not a girly-girl by any means, but this definitely tested my limits. 

There were giant spiders crawling the walls that the owner would throw the cat at so it could eat them. It was also the first time I saw a fully-grown kimodo dragon just walking around.    

This gracious family gave up their beds so that we were comfortable. They would wait until we were finished eating, so that we were never hungry. They offered us everything that they had just because that’s just who they were. No English was spoken by them, and we were reduced to only being able to say ‘Thank you’ in our very poorly spoken Thai. And even through our extreme language barrier, we all understood each other and respected each other. 

The last night we were there, we (families and students) all met on a dock and ate fresh crab that had just been caught. The sun was setting while we were overlooking the ocean and enjoying our fresh and delicious dinner. All of a sudden a dance troupe dressed in traditional Thai garb came out and showed off their cultural dances.    

With all of these experiences, I think the thing that I fell in love with while I was there was the spirit of the people. Yes, the land was beautiful, the food was delectable, and the beer was free-flowing, but the thing I remember most about my time there is the smiles on people’s faces, their unwavering spirit, and their humility.

These are people that not 2 years prior to our arrival had gone through the devastation of a tsunami

Many people had lost family members, friends, homes, and all their possessions.  Despite their deep sadness and loss, I always felt love radiating from everyone that I met and worked with. 

As a psychology major, I had the opportunity to work with a psychologist who was Thai-American and had moved over there after the tsunami to help the communities rebuild both physically and mentally. After meeting him through the program, I was able to work with him at an orphanage. I remember there were days where I would leave and just cry.  And not out of sadness for those children, but because despite what they had gone through and lost, these children smiled and laughed and played. They welcomed anyone that would volunteer there and make them feel welcome. How did these children, who some were no more than 5 years old, have such a deep understanding of empathy and love? How could they grasp such abstract thoughts, that most adults I know, including myself, have not figured out. 

As I remember those days so long ago, I sometimes find myself not believing that I actually got to experience everything I did. It seems so long ago, and when I look back, I feel as though I was another person, so much more naive and not really knowing who I was. 

Family in Phuket. Photo by The Wanderercatt. 

My time in Thailand truly changed the way I saw the world. It changed me in ways that no other experience could have.

I came to appreciate people and cultures that I had never experienced. I learned to see beauty in everyday interactions and it made me realize just how fortunate I truly am.  

I distinctly remember saying to myself, “please remember this feeling right now”. I wanted to hold on to the youthful sense of hope that one person can change the world through love and compassion.

- The Wanderercatt.

MY NEW YEAR'S IN PORTUGAL - First day in Lisbon.

Written by The Travel Butterfly.

Photo by The Travel Butterfly.

Lisboa airport

December 27, 2015.

My flight arrived at five in the morning, and since the check-in at my apartment is at 10am, I have some hours to kill at the airport. 

As I’m savoring a “pastel de nata” in a bakery, I slowly immerse into the happiness of the holidays; I feel so fortunate to have a “first row seat” in the arrival area at the airport so I can watch all the expressions of love: a father’s eyes lighting up when he sees his daughter looking for him, warm and welcoming hugs, and couples kissing. This reminds me of the girl I met while on the endless line for immigration.  She had been traveling for 13 hours and this was her third and last stop before meeting her boyfriend in Porto…. after three months!  It was so sweet to see how she talked about him with so much love and admiration.  I kept thinking how she managed all these emotions; she was going to see her love after three loooooong months and she was going to arrive at a city she had never been before…  such a beautiful story. I wish I could be there to see the reunion.

Photo by The Travel Butterfly.

I almost finished reading “The Alchemist” during my flight.  I’ve always believed in signs and I think there’s a reason this book ended up in my hands.  The book says that when you listen to your heart and go after your dreams, you love your present and get to enjoy the road in search of your dreams.  There’s something to look forward to, and this is when your heart is truly happy…

So, some days ago, I listened to my heart and decided to make a New Year’s trip to Portugal… by myself.  I have proved that my heart is right when it pushes me to be brave and dare to experience life adventures even as a solo traveler.

Well, It’s time to go… I take a cab.  The driver, Jose, is so nice.  An unexpected tour of Lisbon begins as soon as we leave the airport.

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My Sweet First Day in Lisbon

Photo by The Travel Butterfly.

A strong feeling of anticipation rushes in as I get ready to begin discovering the town. I was able to get a few contacts from friends, but I have to admit it’s kind of nerve wrecking when you arrive alone in a completely unknown city for the first time.

My apartment is located in Rua Augusta, right in the center of the city. From my window I get to see the “Arco de la Praça do Comercio”.  Today is Sunday, still early in the morning, and everything is so quiet.  Some shops have begun opening their doors. I wonder if this is always this peaceful. 

Photo by The Travel Butterfly.

Photo by The Travel Butterfly.

I try to fight jetlag, so I leave my apartment and look for a place to have a nice breakfast; I walk a couple of blocks and find this bakery.  I think I might have died and woken up in heaven. This place is sorted with all varieties of breads and pastries. I get a cappuccino, a ham and cheese sandwich made with delicious semi-sweet bread, a cheese fluffy bread roll, and another “dulce de nata”….

I walk a little bit more and I feel like having another coffee. There are no naps in my agenda, just a strong determination to defeat this jetlag. The sweet lady from the coffee shop suggests I try a chocolate cake.... and I’m back in heaven or maybe this is just how sugar comma feels…

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My special tour of Lisbon

A good friend of mine put me in touch with João. They met long time ago when they were backpacking in Europe. They stayed in touch for years and recently met again in Lisbon.  He has assured me that João is the nicest guy I could ever meet in Portugal…

Well, I get ready to meet him for my private tour of Lisbon!  He has asked me to meet him at “Praça Dom Pedro IV”.  I check the map and see it’s only five blocks away from my apartment.  So, I think I should be able to get there in no time…  well, not really... in just a matter of hours, Rua Augusta got packed with shoppers, street artists, and tourists! The entrance of my building is blocked with spectators of a hip-hop dancing show; I get a little bit stressed but manage to go through the crowd. As soon as the road is free, I start walking as fast as possible…

I get to the square and start looking for João. When I finally spot him standing all cute with his hands in his pockets, I realize he is so much better looking in person than in those facebook photos. He sees me and waves with that great smile of his…wow! And here I am, not looking my best and hoping the eye concealer helped me look a little bit “fresher”.

He asks me if I would prefer to walk, and I do. It’s a beautiful day and I love walking; that’s the best way to discover a new town in my opinion.   We walk around Chiado, which is full of designer stores, shops and modern buildings.  João doesn’t talk much. I’m good at reading people but I’m having a hard time with this one…is he shy? I believe I’m pretty friendly, or at least my friends think so, and from time to time, I’m able to get a laugh out of him.

He works for an airline and he’s constantly out of town. The backpacking days are so long gone, he tells me. He asks about my plans for New Year, he will spend it in Azores with family. I have no plans, BUT that’s part of learning how to truly enjoy a spontaneous trip.

We walked by the “Teatro Nacional de São Carlos.” This is the opera house of Lisbon; he tells me he loves watching ballet. I perceive some romanticism hidden behind his introvert personality. 

The theater was opened in 1973 as a replacement for the Tejo Opera House, which was destroyed by the great earthquake in 1755. During the summer, you can enjoy free outdoor performances like opera and ballet.

We get to “Bairro Alto,” and as we start walking in this neighborhood, I feel like I’m quickly falling in love with Lisbon.  I am awestruck by its beautiful streets and its old and charming architecture.

We take a break at a rooftop bar with a view of the city. 

I have to admit, João is not only a nice guy but very good looking as well. He is in perfect shape and has wonderful teeth (I do love beautiful teeth by the way), but... I don’t think there’s any chemistry between us, and it’s fine.  I am sincerely grateful for this day, but that doesn’t mean I do not try to flirt, I do… but I don’t think I’m being reciprocated, so I give up.  He asks me if I am ok and if I’m having a good time. I tell him I am….but I’m sure I look tired (I can only hide the jetlag for so long).  He doesn’t seem convinced with my answer.  So, this is confusing! Besides the fact that he already has spent half of his Sunday with me, and insists on making sure I am enjoying the tour (AND his company), at times, he just seems so uninterested, especially when he spends a lot of time checking his phone... weird!

We walk around Bica. He shows me the “Pink Street” and the places where a lot of the nightlife takes place in Lisbon. After a few blocks of walking and talking, we end up at a small but lively jazz concert by the river: Rio Tejo.

The tour ends with nutella crepes at the Praça do Comércio. He walks me to my building entrance, he gives me a friendly hug, which honestly seems right, but I don’t know how and when things get even more confusing than before…we suddenly stare at each other awkwardly and slowly get closer, and kiss!... or did I kiss him first? Oh boy, I’m not sure… so much for no chemistry!

We kiss again and my brain is still trying to understand what’s happening.  He asks me if I’m going to invite him over but… although he is so attractive and yes, such a good kisser, now that the blur on my head is gone, I kindly say no.

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Table for one por favor

I start walking around my neighborhood looking for a casual place to have dinner. I walk in this place that doesn’t seem too intimidating, and it turns out that the waiters are so polite and friendly. It’s just what I was looking for.

While I enjoy an exaggerated amount of octopus and clams, I watch some heavy flirting going on across my table. A cute waiter spends so much time complementing two young beautiful tourists, it’s funny. It’s great to have something fun to watch while enjoying a meal.  A sweet gentleman who works there checks on me frequently making sure I love my dinner…. And oh, yes! I definitely do. The octopus is tender and the rich olive oil enhances its flavor.

I’m done with dinner and I get ready to leave, but this young flirty waiter approaches me and asks me to stay and have some drinks with him. I lie and tell him I will be back.  He says “goodbye, guapa” (goodbye, good looking)...”Goodbye” I reply thinking: “if you were only a little bit older….” I contain my laugh and continue walking.

Back at my apartment, I get a message from João saying it was great meeting me and hoped I had a good night.  He’s traveling to Azores tomorrow and there are no plans for a second date, but then again, I really have no expectations.  Life is so good now, why would I bother about anything else but being happy and continue falling in love with Lisboa?

Boa noite!

To be continued...